Week thirteen picks are here! Nope, you are not getting Thursday’s games, after attending Wednesday nights Avalanche hockey game I returned home with a three day hangover and a food coma from Thanksgiving’s festivities. Besides, you should never ever bet on a Thursday game. EVER! Unless, of course I tell you otherwise.
Cleveland -7 vs. Jacksonville, 40.5, 11 a.m. CBS
The adorable Brandon Weeden is starting for the Brownies this Sunday, which is part of the reason the line has dropped from -10 where it opened. The Browns are 1-5 when Brandon Weeden throws at least 24 passes. I’m not sure Cleveland should be laying a touchdown against anybody.. I’m taking Jacksonville again. They have paid me the last three weeks in a row. DELIGHT Pick Of The Week!! Whoop Whoop! Let me hear ya holler!!
Indianapolis -4 vs. Tennessee, 45, 11 a.m. CBS
The Colts were just beaten by the Cardinals last week and the Titans beat the Raiders. Tennessee is also the only semi-serious contender for the Colts in the AFC South, this is very close to being a must win game for Tennessee. But, they won’t on the road, against the Colts. Taking Indy and giving the four.
Chicago -1 at Minnesota, 49, 11 a.m. Fox
If it’s a pick ‘em game, I always take the home dog. Besides, Matt Forte is expected to play and the Vikings ended up in a tie last week. Yes folks, somehow there are still ties in football.
NY Jets -2 vs. Miami, 39, 11 a.m. CBS
The Jet’s offense has produced only one touchdown in its last 31 possessions with Geno Smith at quarterback. Granted, the Dolphins can’t block, pass, run the rock or score touchdowns. I’m taking the Jets because I like to live dangerously.
Philadelphia -3 vs. Arizona, 48.5, 11 a.m. Fox
This should be a hell of a game since both teams have been hotter than a lied too, ex-lover. I like Philly to win this coming off their Bye Week. Both teams have great defenses but the Eagles have much more talent on the offensive side. Better coach for that matter.
Carolina -8 vs. Tampa Bay, 41.5, 11 a.m. Fox
Tampa Bay just changed their quarterback from Josh Freeman to rookie Mike Glennon. For that reason alone I am taking the Panthers and laying all those points.
New England -7 at Houston, 47.5, 11 a.m. CBS
Houston is coming off a pathetic loss against the Jaguars which brought the truth out. The Texans are terrible, awful, dreadful, rotten, appalling, and abysmal. (Yes, I still own that thesaurus.) The Patriots are going to embarrass them again. This is a DELIGHT Pick of the Week for me. Here is a fun bet too, take 150 rushing yards for NE as your over/under and take the over.
Buffalo -3.5 vs. Atlanta, 46.5, 2:05 p.m. Fox
Hey there dontcha know, this game is going north of the border, in Toronto’s Rogers Centre. The Bills have the NFL’s 10th best defense and the Falcons, well the Falcons suck. Don’t believe me?? This is the first time Buffalo has been favored this year. Pop yourself a Great Lakes Brewery’s Winter Ale and take the Bills, lay the points.
San Francisco -8.5 vs. St. Louis, 42, 2:05 p.m. Fox
The Rams are a much better team than the one that was obliterate in week 4. I think the Niners still win this game but they don’t cover. Yes I am crazy, I drink too much and enjoy the occasional tryst from time to time, and I am also taking the Rams as a DELIGHT Pick of the Week!!
Denver -5.5 at Kansas City, 49, 2:25 p.m. CBS
Wow it’s cold outside… ‘How cold is it?’ It’s colder than a polar bears toenail. It’s colder than my tiny, Scottish, red-headed mothers, ‘evil eye’. It’s colder than a witch’s teat in a brass bra. It’s cold enough the Peyton Manning throws 19-36, 150 yards, with a pick and a 70.4 passing rating.. DAMN, THAT’S COLD!!
In all likely hood, whoever wins this wins the AFC West and will have the number one seed in the AFC. Big game is putting it lightly and it will come down to Alex Smith making a play or two. So far in his career he hasn’t. Good quarterback with no pizzazz. Although I’ll give it up that he should have won a ring in San Francisco a couple years ago. Hmmmmm, can he make a play this Sunday against the Broncos?? Sure why not, I’m taking the Chiefs at home in December.
San Diego -1 vs. Cincinnati, 48.5, 2:25 p.m. CBS
This game is blacked out in southern California because Charger fans are clowns that won’t even go to a game. San Diego is playing decent ball again too. I’m taking the Clowns to win on the simple premise that I want three teams from the AFC West going to the playoffs.
NY Giants -1.5 at Washington, 45.5, 6:30 p.m. NBC
The Giants win and win easily. Shanahan has already called Peyton Manning and gave him his eviction notice. Washington and their racist name are in complete state of disarray. Done and Done… DELIGHT Pick of the Week!!
Seattle -5 vs. New Orleans, 45.5, Monday 6:30 p.m. ESPN
What a great MNF game. I’m taking Seattle because I have to pick every game every week. You want something a little more in depth? Get your own column.
NOTES: The Broncos, Chiefs and Seattle all have the possibility of clinching a playoff berth with a win and some help around the league.
Happy Thanksgiving my friends!! Hope it was a great one!!
Cuss or Call at @WhizKid18
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Shayne is a Colorado native with a life love of sports. He's been studying and loving this state and their teams for four decades.